The Quicksand Assessment. By, Julie
What Not to Say
Ed "Oh no! I am sinking! I stepped into quicksand; which is a well-known natural phenomenon consisting of a mixture of sand, clay, and water! I am in grave danger!"
Marv: "This is a truly unfortunate and distressing situation! I must think critically about how to assist you before you are entirely submerged and perish!"
Ed: "Please act quickly, as I am already at a depth of approximately three feet, and according to scientific studies, struggling will only increase my rate of descent!"
Marv: "I recall from an article I once read that I must procure a sturdy branch or rope to pull you out while ensuring my own safety!"
Ed: "Yes, indeed, that is the correct course of action! Please execute it expeditiously!"
How would you write this scene in a way that feels natural and that moves the story forward?